For as long as I can remember, I've dealt with anxiety.
Like most people, I've had a number of traumatizing events happen in my life, starting from early child hood until now.
And while I've done a lot of inner work to deal with my demons, it's still hard not to feel triggered sometimes.
Enter alcohol. I remember loving the feeling of being drunk. There was a time when I couldn't wait to get that feeling of "being someone else."
I was such a control freak, that losing control of my mind and body was actually relaxing to me. For a (very short) minute, I really felt alcohol was the answer to my anxiety.
Until it wasn't.
What I didn't know then was that by drinking so much, I was actually making my anxiety worst.
Did you know that alcohol changes the levels of serotonin in your brain? When you drink alcohol, you are exposing yourself to higher levels of anxiety that can take hours to wear off.
I know a lot of us drink because we have social anxiety. When we put ourselves in a situation where we have to be around other people it makes sense that we reach for alcohol as liquid courage.
But what we are essentially doing is "borrowing" that courage. Once the alcohol wears off, the anxiety comes back... and it charges interest.
That is why it is so important to be fully aware of our emotions, triggers and fears. If you have a very social life but get a lot of anxiety being around people be proactive about dealing with your anxiety.
Take courses on public speaking, watch Ted Talks, do shadow work, or come up with a pre socializing ritual.
Remember, drinking should be for fun, for pairing with good food, for having a good open conversation, never as an avoider or a coping mechanism.
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Cheers to new habits!
XO, Edna